van Rensburg, Joshua Jansens

September 24, 2002 – November 2, 2002

A tribute to Joshua

From a Father to his Son

This is the second time youíve done this to me. The first time you just popped into our life and changed everything, right down to the finest little detail. You took over my life, taught me things about myself that I didnít know. You became my source of joy and inspiration.

We had such plans, you and me ñ fishing, camping, rugby, – you were going to play for the Sharks one day. We were going to do it all together, you and me. You were so beautiful and so perfect, that it was hard to believe you were real. The hardest thing I ever had to do was go to work and leave you behind, I couldnít wait to get home ñ until now.

Yes, youíve done it again, youíve changed my life again, nothing will ever be the same again ñ how can it be when youíre not here to share it with me? I still hear your little voice and see your angelic little face, but youíre not here ñ youíve gone on without me.

I know youíll be happy there, but I also know that we wonít, because you were the secret ingredient to our happiness. There was still so much I needed to share with you, but five weeks was just not enough. But then five years would not have been enough time to explain to you how much we love you.

How am I going to get through those long lonely nights without the interesting discussions we had ñ Trust me when I say that I understood every word you said, at five weeks old you understood all my problems and had the answer to all my questions.

You fought so bravely and so courageously that I just know in my heart that you are the newest addition to the army of God, and we are so proud of you!

So ñ little angel, look down on your mother and me from time to time and know that we carry you in our hearts forever! And think of us as we try to find our way without you, because itís not going to be easy. I do not even begin to understand why you were taken and probably never will. But I am eternally grateful for the five weeks we were granted.

Remember we will always love you!

Shane & Michelle